


Unfathomable

by miss_aligned



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mass Effect 3, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 21:32:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6874420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_aligned/pseuds/miss_aligned
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A bitter, brutal fight ends in a way that Shepard hadn't anticipated and she doesn't know how to cope in the aftermath.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unfathomable

An exasperated hiss escaped Shepard as she knowingly fired off her last shot. For that gun, anyway. She turned her head, using the periphery of her vision to keep track of her opponent. He was going to pop out any moment, seemingly from nowhere, and renew the fight. With practiced grace and speed, she stowed one weapon and retrieved another, leaping forward just as another shot dented metal and shattered glass precisely where her head had been resting.

The commander skidded to a stop behind a desk, turning her attention back to where she’d just been to try and assess where he was and how he might be moving. Judging by the trajectory of the shot, she could narrow down his position to one corner of the room. It was a start.

She held her pistol at the ready and peered over the desk, having determined, in at least a general sense, where her enemy was hidden. A slight shuffling noise helped to confirm her assumption, but also had her on edge because he was on the move again. She was determined to end this as quickly as possible, knowing that the longer this fight lasted, the more likely she was to lose.

Losing was not an option.

Shepard ducked down once more, waiting and listening. He was nearly silent. She almost had to respect him for that, but it wasn’t enough to take the time to reason with or save him. She shifted her stance, allowing her to move her feet from the floor to the desk as she prepared to spring. All at once, her muscles tensed and she shoved the desk forward using those tightly coiled leg muscles, directly into her opponent’s path. She heard him stumble and she began to fire.

Her brow furrowed as she unleashed her fury upon him. Countless nights of lost sleep, fits of anxiety, bouts of paranoia, and unrelenting anger all came to a head in a barrage of shots punctuated by her furious scream. She would kill him or die trying. This all ended now.

The familiar click of an overheated clip allowed an unnerving silence to settle across the room. She rose to her feet and checked herself for injuries. Surely, with as many shots as had been fired between the two of them, she’d at least been grazed, hadn’t she? Miraculously, she was fine, but her opponent, the fabled Kai Leng, had crumpled to the ground with a pool of blood slowly growing around him. He’d apparently forgotten how to aim in his final moments. For once, she’d had a lucky break.

Shepard breathed a sigh of relief as she dared to step a little closer. She quickly replaced her clip, not fully trusting him to submit or surrender to the inevitable. Despite his condition, he smiled at her from the floor. It wasn’t a peaceful or forgiving gesture, either. It was the twisted, pleased, self-indulgent grin of a madman. Something about it made her gut twist.

It was then that she heard something clatter to the floor behind her. Turning her head in reaction to the sound, she saw a figure slumping forward, a gun having just slipped out of a hand to the floor. Framed harshly by a bright light in the distance, Shepard almost couldn’t identify the soldier. It was as he dropped to his knees that she got a clear glimpse of blue accompanied by distinctive white striping. Her heart fell to her toes at the sight.

Even before he fully hit the ground, she was there, gripping him tightly and lowering him over her lap. “Kaidan,” she struggled in vain to keep her tone calm and collected. There was terror clearly written in her features. “Where were you hit?”

He stared at her for a moment, obviously still stunned by the situation. He offered her a gentle smile before responding. “Good. You’re okay.”

“Hey,” Shepard responded, more forcefully this time in order to get him to focus. “Why would you just stand out in the open like that?”

His eyes roamed her face slowly, as though committing it to his memory. She, meanwhile, frantically set to work with her omni-tool, scanning him and preparing medigel. “If he focused on me, then he wouldn’t hit you.”

Her brow furrowed as she noticed the dark pool expanding under him. Her gaze moved to his face, realizing even in the severe lighting conditions that he was growing paler by the second. Tears burned behind her eyes as she cursed herself for not protecting him. Again. She began to panic, shaking as she held him close, suddenly unsure of what to do.

Kaidan’s voice was quiet, but unbearably calm. “I love you. You know that, right?”

Shepard stared at him in disbelief for a moment as her mind raced. Finally, she lowered herself down, her face mere inches from his. “Don’t. Please don’t say your goodbyes.”

“I think I have to.”

“I love you. I can’t do this without you.” She was pleading with him now, heedless to anything else in the galaxy.

“I think you have to.”

The pained wail that escaped her as she watched the light leave his eyes violently shook the commander awake. Tears were streaming down the sides of her face and her chest ached as she began to curl in on herself. Her breathing was erratic as she blinked the nightmare away from her vision and tried to make sense of what was happening around her.

Was she in the med bay recovering from another of her prothean-induced hallucinations? Had she been knocked out in the middle of a firefight? Was she on an operating table again with gunshots ringing in the distance and an unfamiliar voice encouraging her to fight her way free? She remained quiet and still for several long, agonizing moments before she realized that all was still and she was safe. She was in her bed and didn’t need to reach for a gun to survive.

An arm snaked around her waist so suddenly that she jumped at the contact. Still, she breathed a sigh of relief as she gathered her wits about her, reassuring herself that none of what she’d just witnessed had actually happened. Kaidan was alive and well. Kai Leng was also alive, of course, but that didn’t seem nearly as important anymore.

Shepard swiped a hand across that familiar, reassuring arm until hers was resting atop of his. He rather effortlessly pulled her closer, until she was pressed flush against his chest. She could tell, despite the light kiss planted on her shoulder as he settled behind her, that he was still mostly asleep. She was thankful that she hadn’t jolted him awake in her terror as she had countless times before. He deserved to rest, regardless of the badly damaged and troubled woman he’d chosen as his partner.

The shaking hadn’t stopped, but she concentrated on listening to his steady breathing. She forced the image of his death from her mind by focusing on the feeling of his skin pressed against hers. He nuzzled into her neck, unknowingly reassuring her that he was fine and so was she. Even in his sleep, his presence and touch were consistently the most comfort Shepard had ever been afforded.

She didn’t deserve him or his reassurance, she knew, but was so very appreciative of it all the same. She’d caused him so much pain and turmoil over the years, even if unintentionally, and still he was here.

He was her strength. Her soft place to land.


End file.
